I'm The Only Person That Still Writes In Cursive For Fun

Like cursive, we were connected,
Up until the page turned and tore us apart
Everyday we don’t speak,
Is another day I realize I don’t need you.
That is not the way I wanted it to work.

I’m growing though,
Don’t worry about me.
I’m growing.
Don’t you worry about me.

I know you won’t.
I’m the least of your cares.
I don’t know if I ever really was important,
Might have been somebody that was just there.

Keep walking kid.
Keep your head held up high.
Keep writing kid.
Keep writing away.
I promise you that there is more to be written.

So I curved an M and then an E
The suspense came at full speed
The ash tray filled and I breathed.

Slowly a Y and then an O
Dropped the pen on the ground and I smoked some more.

Anxiety is racing,
And I am all alone
Despondent and distrusting girl,
You’ll never find your U.

Hot Mess

I love what I shouldn't and I hate what I should love.

High Hopes and Expectations

High hopes and expectations
are some of the the things I hate the most
Waste of time and desperation
But it looks like I've got no choice

Discomfort and nausea, now I'm growing weary
And I look for you, but there's nothing except fear
Unknown circumstances and endless nights without sleep
I'm anxious, I've fallen, there's no rising to my feet

The bed is so much bigger now
So many things left unsaid
High hopes and expectations
They are completely useless









Give up.

You said you may have not been born,
if your father was drafted to war
I said I was happy you were born
because I am happy you were born

That look you gave me when I said it
sent me melting to the floor
And even though you hate me now,
I am happy you were born

There's a boy that looks just like you
He is sprawled across my floor
His eyes are bright
His smile is white
It reminds me of yours

He told me he hated himself
He wished he was never born
And I thought of your father going off to war
I am happy you were born

You know what hurts worst about a broken heart?

Not being able to remember what you felt like before.

I Have Not Posted To Here In A While

I send emails to Charlotte when I need to vent.
Charlotte is nice.
I wish I was healthy and normal so that I could be fully happy for her.
I suck.